My Moans

I’ve been told it’s good to get things off your chest, so here goes….

Disabled Facilities: Do You Abuse Them? I Bet You Have!

Disabled Facilities: Do You Abuse Them? I Bet You Have! – Disabled facilities are there to help disabled people achieve the same daily tasks able-bodied people take for granted. By abusing these facilities, you are preventing us from living our daily life as you expect to live yours…..Without fighting for your basic human rights!!

Disabled Toilets: How Many Times Have You Used One?

My life as a wheelchair user is difficult enough with the barriers I face on a daily basis. Shops I’m unable to enter due to lack of access, card readers too high/too far back to reach when paying for my shopping, people leaning on my wheelchair like I’m some sort of leaning post, derogatory comments etc, the list truly is endless.

Disabled Facilities:  Do You Abuse Them?  I Bet You Have!  -  Disabled toilet fitted with handrails, changing table.

So when I need to use the toilet and an able-bodied person walks out of the disabled toilet, I’m angry, why? Well, one of the reasons is I suffer from IBS, it is one of the most unpredictable illnesses I suffer from. The urgency one feels when having an attack is frightening, so when you are made to wait for probably the only disabled toilet available and a non-disabled person walk out, why wouldn’t I be furious.

I have been close more times than I care to mention to having an “accident” because someone’s selfishness has made me wait for a disabled toilet unnecessarily. Who wants that? I certainly don’t, especially when it could have been avoided!

Changing places toilets

Changing places toilets are important to many disabled people as they have a changing table for those that need assistance going to the toilet. This is obviously much more preferable than having to lie down on dirty, wet, urine-stained flooring, which is what has to happen if a changing places toilet is not available or present. You really would be disgusted and angry if it was your child or family member who had to lie on this kind of filthy flooring.

Most standard Men & Ladies toilets have more than one cubicle/urinal for use. To use and take away what is normally the only disabled toilet available is not only selfish but inconsiderate to those of us that have medical reasons for “needing” to use a toilet urgently.

Please in future, be more mindful of which toilet you use.

Disabled Parking Bays: You Will Only Be Two Minutes, So It’s OK!

I’m fed up the number of times I’ve been told, “I’ll only be a minute”, “I’m just popping to cash machine, I won’t be long”!! I don’t care how long you will be!!! IT IS ILLEGAL to park in a disabled parking bay without a blue badge. Currently, the average fine for parking illegally in an enforceable disabled person parking bay is £30 this can rise to a maximum of £1000. Personally, I don’t believe that’s much of a deterrent!!

Car parked in a disabled bay with no blue badge on display

Rule 241 of the Highway Code says:

You MUST NOT park in parking spaces reserved for specific users, such as Blue Badge holders, residents or motorcycles unless entitled to do so. Source: www.gov.uk – Highway Code

Parking in a disabled bay illegally can mean the difference between me completing my task, shopping, Dr’s/hospital appointment, attending a meeting or having to turn around and go back home again. There have been numerous occasions where I have had to go home without being able to do whatever it was I set out to do and that is the key here, not being able to do what I want/need to do!

Your selfishness and inconsideration have a detrimental effect on my daily life, you can not begin to understand the strain my body goes through when I have to get in/out of my wheelchair to get in/out of the car. Not once but 4 times just to do one trip!! It can take up to 2 days for my body to recover, so no, I am not tolerant of your behaviour……Why should I be!!

I wonder how tolerant you would be about these inconsiderate actions if I were the one telling you that “I will only be a minute, just popping to the cash machine”, or “I’m just dropping this letter off”? If this was a daily occurrence in your life, how accepting would you be?

Wheelchair Space on Buses: You Didn’t Fight For Them, Yet Happy to Prevent Those That Did From Using Them!


Well, where do I start with this one? Oh yes, disabled people fought and fought for these spaces, year after year, after year until finally, we succeeded. Then, along came buggy pushers and thought it quite acceptable to use these spaces when a wheelchair user needs it, you know, the ones we disabled people fought for! The space that has that lovely big blue sticker stating priority wheelchair area. Exactly!!!

Where were all the buggy pushers when we were fighting for this space? Hmmm? exactly! Yet now the hard work has been done and the wheelchair space is now implemented, you are happy to take advantage of the wheelchair space provided for wheelchair users!!

Now don’t get me wrong, I really have NO objection to buggy pushers using this space, IF ONLY YOU WOULD MOVE WHEN NEEDED BY A WHEELCHAIR USER!!!!! The problem is that quite a lot of you buggy pushers REFUSE blankly to move……The signage is very clear in it’s meaning!! You are more than welcome to use the wheelchair space if NOT NEEDED by a wheelchair user. If it is needed, you MUST MOVE. It really isn’t rocket science you know.

It really does infuriate me when this happens as we wheelchair users only have ONE place we can use on a bus, buggy pushers have other options available to them if they so wish. You are basically taking away our right to travel as able-bodied travellers would expect to travel.

Legal Battle

Mr Paulley successfully sued FirstGroup at Leeds County Court for unlawful discrimination against him due to his disability. However, First Group appealed and the case was finally heard by the Supreme Court. On 18 January 2017, it made a landmark ruling that bus companies must end ‘first come, first served’ policies and do more to cater for wheelchair users. Read more: Equality and Human Right Commission

Conclusion

At the end of the day, like it or not, disabled people are not looking for “special treatment/services”, we just want to be able to live our lives as independently as possible and that does mean adjustments need to be made to standardised services.

Simple example. If your vision is not 20/20, what do you do? You visit an optician to get your eyesight tested, yes? If it turns out that you need glasses, you get them. So why should it be any different for someone who’s legs do not work to not be allowed to use an adapted toilet? How would you feel if you were told you couldn’t have/wear the glasses you “needed” to perform your daily tasks???? Think about that one!!

Disabled people are told daily, they can’t have this, can’t use that all because some of you are too selfish and self-important to even try to understand why we “need” these adaptions.

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Our.com logo next to Our bingo logo

Our Bingo: A Place To Be Bullied

Our Bingo: A Place To Be Bullied – Our.com is a games platform where you can play many different games, including bingo. The trouble is, bullying is rife and Our have done nothing to prevent this from continuing.

Why Play Bingo

I play bingo via Facebook from a company called Our.com. The game concept is rather good in the respect that it is very much like the real thing…..1 line, followed by 2 lines, followed by a full house. I don’t want to go into in’s and out’s of the game as this is not a blog to showcase this game but to showcase the bullying but unfortunately, I will have to describe part of the game to be able to give you some reference as to what I am going to talk about.

I play most evening with my elderly Mum, (every evening through the lockdown) as she is being targeted by the same players and bullied. We go on Skype so I can keep her mind occupied while playing. Now I know what you are thinking, why does she play if she is subjected to this kind of behaviour? I totally understand what you are saying and if it was me, I would find somewhere else.

But here is the problem. My Mum is 70 and nervous about technology, so afraid of trying anything new. (Believe me, I have tried). We have played this game for many years now and she is comfortable in the knowledge that she knows how to play/use this game. Her days are unfortunately empty of things to do, so to keep her mind occupied, she plays this game. As she says, it’s the only little pleasure that she has. More importantly, though, why should anyone be made feel to leave an online game because of bullies????

In-Game Bullying

Over the past year (roughly), the game has deteriorated to the point that there are no more decent jackpots to play for (except, funnily enough, the most expensive room). When mum and I first started playing this site, years ago, the site had many many different great jackpots in all the rooms and at times you were jumping from room to room buying cards and never remembering where you were playing. It was extremely fun to play, even if you didn’t win.

In-game coin purchases though, have always been very expensive for what you get, so, this has never changed. Your win rate is near to none and admittedly, the same players do seem to win the majority of the big jackpots and these players always seem to have millions of coins. (My mum believes that they are geared to win as the devs know these players will never need to “buy” coins, so let the others lose in the hope they will “buy”). Indeed a good theory and also, if true, a great recipe to encourage players to get bitter at other players. I have also noticed that there are a few players that fit the bill of being “bot” players but obviously, no proof. (I researched and looked into starting my own bingo site, so I know about these things).

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fuk you mother****** – I hope you get coronavirus – why don’t you just die

I can understand why players get upset…..Same winners, bot players, purchasing coins after coins and never winning. Winning and losing it all in one night…..I get it! But……There have been many, many derogatory, nasty comments that have shocked me and I’m not easily shocked!. I’m appalled that someone could actually call another player these awful names. Some have actually said they want X player to die! Or hope they get Covid19. There have been players that have used the game name Coronavirus and such like and their profiles say they are from China.

There are many other comments that thankfully not all can read as many players come from all over the world, so different languages are spoken in the chat. (Google translate is my best friend when playing). Many comments are about same winners, the game being a fix, ghost players etc. but this is the kind of behaviour Our seem to completely ignore as I myself, have complained many times regarding bullying etc. Still, nothing has been done. Actually, many of us have complained to Our but all complaints seem to fall on deaf ears.

In my opinion, the simplest solution would be to have a facility that enables you to close your chat if you want to. Something I have suggested to them. This would solve 99% of the problems. At present, the chat box is always visible while playing, so you can see all comments being made. The only way to hide the chat box is if you have sent a friend request to another player and, they accept. This then enables you to open a private chat with them. So when I play at the same time as my mum, mum can open a PM chat with me which in turn hides the main chat. There is a block facility but this doesn’t work.

Police Matter

When you are being targeted by the same players repeatedly, daily, who make comments such as (oh, by the way, all comments I show are just aimed at my mum and now me as I try to stick up for her and the more politer ones): “this millionaire is in all the rooms”, “watch out always the same”, “gaybasssh”, fuk you mother******…..every time you have a win, (Big or small, once or more) than it becomes cyberbullying and harassment. Therefore, I am now keeping a diary of all the comments made to my mum and myself, so I may report it to the police.

Before you think am I making matters worse, my mum has never retaliated, she just sits and takes it, partly because she can’t type and would take her week to write a sentence. I have never retaliated either but now I just inform whoever is making the comment that their comment has been copied and will be forwarded onto the police investigating cyberbullying on the site. That does seem to keep them quiet for the rest of the evening.

The Game

Hopefully, this will help give some context to what I have been saying.

The game gives you 1000 coins a day for free to play with. You have several different rooms to play in, that cost a different amount of coins per card purchase. These rooms allow a capacity of up to 100 players at any one time:

  • 50 rooms – Cost 50 coins per card purchased (24 max)
  • 100 rooms – Cost 100 coins per card purchased (24 max)
  • 200 rooms – Cost 200 coins per card purchased (24 max)
  • 1000 rooms – Cost 1000 coins per card purchased (24 max)

You have a Jackpot ball that starts off at ball 30, every consecutive game, this number goes up one number. The idea is to call bingo (full house) within that number to win the jackpot. Great concept!

The trouble is, the site devs seem to only now be concentrating on the 1000 room. So it is almost impossible to play without purchasing coins. 24 cards at 1000 coins per card are much more than what the site gives you to play with. You would have to save your free coins for 24 days to be able to play one game. Crazy right! So, if there is nowhere to play but the 1000 room and you have let’s say 5000 coins, your options are: Buy 5 out of 24 cards against possibly 99 other players, don’t play, or purchase more coins. Purchasing coins would for most, seem the logical solution (I know, outside of not playing at all). But, wait until you see the cost of purchasing these coins:

Price list for purchasing coins on Our.com website - Our Bingo:  A Place To Be Bullied

(Prices correct at 19/7/20 – On PC device). What you may not realise while playing, is the fact these prices change, depending on the device you are using. There is no consistency across devices. I have played on my tablet and found the prices to be much higher than on my PC (my usual device). They also vary depending on whether you are playing via Facebook, or the website itself!

All of these factors, I believe (purposeful or not) can encourage players to get frustrated, fed up and in turn, take it out on other players. Of course, there are just some really nasty people in the world that get a kick out of bullying others.

Conclusion

My mum, a 70-year-old lady, set in her ways, scared of using anything new on the computer, very little to occupy her day loves playing this little game called Our bingo for many years. She gets bullied and harassed if she has won, big or small.

  • Should she now be “forced” to look elsewhere?
  • Our.com should not be allowed to neglect its responsibility to protect its players?
  • Cyberbullying can never be accepted as everyday life online?

I believe the answer to all of the above should be a resounding NO!!

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Why Do You Never Finish What Your…….

Ok, my pet peeve is when I am browsing my social media accounts and I read something someone has started talking about, ranting about or explaining, I read through all the comments only to find the original poster has not concluded the rant, story or explanation!!! WHY, WHY WHY do you do this???

I am reading your post because what you have to say is interesting to me, do I not want to know how the story ends?? Of course, or else I would have continued scrolling!!

I have found that this happens a lot when people are moaning about something that has gone wrong for them. Accessibility, customer service, bad service etc. It would be extremely helpful to those of us that have read your post to know if you managed to solve your issue and if so, how?

I appreciate you may have posted while on the move but at least come back to those of us that have commented/read your post and give an update. Otherwise, you could run the risk of people thinking you are out for attention/sympathy!! Which of course we know a lot are!!

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